I went on a 40 mile bike ride this morning. That's right, 40 whole miles. I didn't cry or anything! In fact, I chatted with other riders throughout the ride. Oh yeah, I'm nearly a pro now. That rainy day was just hazing. I survived, and now I'm really good. Okay, so I'm still really slow, but I didn't fall of the bike this time (even though I came dangerously close at the very end of the ride when I got to my car).
I did start to wonder how people manage to ride long distances on a bike seat without going totally numb "down there". My seat is "women specific" because the original saddle was horrendously awful, and I was afraid that I'd accidentally give myself that procedure that people learn about in Cultural Anthropology 101...you know, the one given to women in some tribal cultures in Africa. Do I really need to say it?
Regardless of the fact that my seat includes a c--- slit, it's still not like sitting around on my couch (which is almost always comfortable, unless I sit there too long and my skin grows into the fabric like on that episode of Nip/Tuck with Big Mama). I would go as far as saying that yesterday's self-improvement project of getting the hair RIPPED from my legs was less painful/uncomfortable than sitting on my bike seat for 3 hours. I suppose the reason for that is that my legs endured the pain for a total of 30 minutes, and the actual "pain" only lasts about 2 seconds per rip. But still, if you've ever had the hair ripped off of the front of your ankles, you know that the 2 seconds of pain is worth a whimper.
So how do people do this? Is this why girls don't ride bikes as avidly as boys? And what about the boys? They have special seats too, so there must be something to whine about.
Maybe Dr. Scholl's should make gel seats like their gel insoles. Then my naughty bits would be gellin' like Magellon, too.
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