Just the other day I was driving back from Berkeley, and I saw a frightful sight. Okay, so frightful might be a bit dramatic, but it was a little annoying. Those magnetic ribbons have totally lost their initial intent and meaning (and this is coming from someone that was never fully on board with them in the first place). Why, you ask? Well, because I was driving behind a minivan with one of those magnetic ribbons. The only thing that made it unlike all other magnetic ribbons (you know, "Support Our Troops", pink ribbons for breast cancer, red ribbons for AIDS, yellow ribbons for victims of tragedies like war or post office massacres and the like) was that it had soccer balls all over it and said "SOCCER MOM". That's right, people, soccer moms need a ribbon too, because, without it, I would never have guessed that the person driving a Dodge caravan full of kids and baby seats might, in fact, be a mother. My first guess is usually exterminator or carpet cleaner. (And, yes, I do realize that my rant makes me seem bitter, childless, and alone...but really, I'm quite happy-go-lucky). Admittedly, I saw this coming. From the second the "Support Our Troops" magnetic ribbons came into vogue, I knew bumper stickers were headed down yet another annoying path. This one screamed of nostalgia for the "Baby on Board" signs that took over the roadways several years ago. It's totally ridiculous. And, I realize that I'm being a total hypocrite because I laughed at the "God Bless Matador" ribbons, but still! I'm just annoyed. They went from a sign of remembrance, to political statement, to trite declaration of suburban motherhood. Stop the madness people. Just say no to annoying bumper sticker statements (unless of course it will make me laugh while I sit behind you in traffic for an hour or so). As much as I hate to admit it, I'd welcome a "Whirled Peas" bumper sticker...or maybe I've gone too far.
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